My new Colorado driver’s license is a flimsy piece of shit.

June 20th, 2007

It just showed up in the mail. My new driver’s license, from my new state of residence. Colorado. And holy crap! this driver’s license is a flimsy piece of shit. It looks like it was designed by somebody who really hated their job. Let me tell you the negative qualities of this driver’s license in list form:

• It’s thin
• It’s ugly
• It doesn’t have Colorado’s cool state flag “C” symbol thingy anywhere
• It displays my middle name. I hate my middle name.
• It uses Zapf Chancery, the font on everyone’s Macintosh back in 1992, as the typeface. Zapf Chancery is a flimsy piece of shit.

I saw plenty of Colorado’s old, 1999-era licenses. Those looked good. They had dignity. These pastel suck-bucket identification cards don’t.

</rant>

p.s. The one good thing: Colorado doesn’t put your social security number on your driver’s license anymore. Whoever had that great idea ought to be confined to whatever pastel-gradient hell the designer of this soggy id will be entering when they depart.

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